Ko Lanta, Thailand, 30 December 2006

Traveled down from Bangkok in a 2nd class sleeper on the overnight train (comfortable and value for money). Arrived in Krabi after briefly being kidnapped by a tourist bus while bleary eyed at 5am (a tourist bus smelling of urine).

Rather than do the proverbial and head for the beach, Al had discovered Panom Bencha Mountain Resort which is run by a Swiss hippie. Tony the hippie speaks no Thai, rather he is content to own a few mountain huts and entertain guests in order to make up a complete Patonk team for the evenings. We trekked the mountains around Krabi for a day and caught up on some reading.

Christmas Eve we took a long boat from Krabi port to West Railai and from there to Ao Ton Sai which is a collection of bungalows and bars right on the beach. Ton Sai and Railai beaches are surrounded by cliffs and each beach is a climbing Mecca. In the mornings it’s possible to have breakfast on the sand while watching people scale the inclines above you (people so ripped up there isn’t any fat on them).

We met up with Jon and Kate on Ton Sai and together we rented sea kayaks and paddled over to Chicken Island (fairly ripped up ourselves as a result). Chicken is a national park and no one may stay on it. Thanks to this restriction, it’s one of the best beaches in the area and we were able to do some great snorkeling (lots of nemos). Al and I have just spent 7 days on the beach and the swimming was so good we took an organized snorkeling trip to some of the coral reefs too far to kayak to.

The real highlight on Ton Sai though was a climbing session on one of the cliffs near West Railai. Basically using our fingers we scaled a cliff. I’m even proud to say it had an incline (a small one, but an incline nonetheless). The rush isn’t wearing off. I think we may be buying climbing boots and chalk when we get home. We’re certainly researching opportunities to do some more while we’re here.

Today we took a boat down to Ko Lanta, an island at the southern most tip of Krabi Province. We’ve scaled up our accommodation because New Year left us with little options than a honey moon resort. So we’re going comfy with hot water for four days.

The only way to get around Lanta is by scooter and we rented one and were immediately stopped by the police for not wearing helmets. Insanely, it was the most pleasant experience I’ve ever had with a policeman – while Al went down the road to pay the fine (BHT200) I was offered a chair, tea, coffee, watermelon or water by the police at the road block. When AL came back they apologized profusely and sent us on our way.

Now we're zipping around like Italians (or, as Al says, like retro Nazis in our helmets). Thank god for travel insurance!

Bangkok, Thailand. December 20th

Bangkok: surreal, big, shiny, dirty, crowded, overwhelming and cheap.

Beware of:
a) tuk tuk drivers who helpfully drop you off at tailors and jewellery stores in exchange for commissions (although this is still the most exciting and efficient way to travel around Bangkok, so just be stern).
b) crazy bird ladies who thrust unwanted seeds into your hand, watch you be maulled by flesh eating feral pigeons and then shout '50Bhat!' at you as if you've robbed her.
c) hippies with dreads and tatoos who sit around in western cafes around Khoa San road watching American football and complaining to the waiters (beware only because of irrational peer pressure you feel to tatoo and dread yourself)

Enjoy:
a) the random friendliness of Thai people everywhere who are genuinely pleased to hear where you are from and welcome you to Thailand.
b) Thai massage (brutally pleasant, although Al was not so keen on having his balls touched by Julio the not-so-Thai masseuse)
c) the Night Markets, set in an aphitheatre complete with rock concert (the Thai version of Oasis is pretty good)
d) travel by riverbus in the fresh sea breeze (hop on and hop off at your peril)

Getting better at:
a) bargining (though still crap)

Highlights:
The Indian sweatshop owner (sorry, Tailor) sizing us up (while our unrepentant Tuk Tuk driver peered hopefully in from the window) and saying "hmm, you South Africans don't know quality, you never like to spend much. I think you go back to London and buy second hand coat. That is better for you".

Posted secrets

Recently I've been an avid reader of http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

Here are a few secrets of my own (some may not be secrets if you know me well)

1. I'm a really efficient project manager. But I wish I was valued more for my creativity than my enthusiasm at work.

2. I made out on the beach last night instead of packing for Thailand. I think I've forgotten my shampoo. I'm going to have to use Alastair's. (It was so much fun!)

3. My father was murdered violently. Yet I'm still against the death penalty.

4. I got off a plane in Brunei and remembered what I'd forgotten, and definitely don't miss, about the third world.

5. Paul would raise an eyebrow at my use of the term 'third world'. Although it would appeal to Wei's sense of humour.

6. I am really proud of my little sister.

7. Everytime a nice boy comes to Australia, he gets to go and stay with Steve Marconi.

8. I can't wait until soccer season starts again (this is possibly not a secret).

9. There is a guy next to me in this internet cafe who has put a towel over his head and gone to sleep. Right now, this doesn't look like a bad idea.